The Need to Hate

I was getting ready to write a short piece on the difficulties of finding work today. About trying to find a job when someone is 50, over 20 years experience in a particular field, but getting passed over for kids right out of college. I know the reasons, and they are quite sound from a long-term ROI point of view. Still, the more I wrote the angrier I got. I realized I had started using the word “hate” quite a bit in my rhetoric. Then it hit me. The “hating” made me actually feel a little better about myself. I was transferring a lot of my own insecurities and “hate” of my own inability and inaction onto others. It felt empowering, and oh so wrong. I was fired up and words were flowing when wham… it hit me. Humans seem to have a need to hate.

I stopped writing and started pondering on how it might apply to the world. The ongoing Muslim Mosque/not-a-Mosque issues came to mind. There are groups now springing up all over the US trying to stop Mosques. One in Tennessee is trying to “stop” the formation of a Mosque that has been there for 30 years. I think deep down these people know there is no issue, that in reality, any terrorist cell would most likely be operating as far from the public eye as possible. But it’s just plain easier to hate. Makes us forget that we’ve abandoned our own gods. Makes us feel better when we do something violent or wrong to be able to say, “Hell, at least I’m not a Muslim terrorist!” Humans seem to use the hate to sooth the feeling of inadequacy when shown how little we actually know. Hate is like saying, “I know you are, but what am I”. Childish, immature, and yet so easy to say.

Humans seem to have a need to hate. But do we really need to? Are we doomed to forever walk around with chips on our shoulders, looking for a fight because we can’t kick the dog? I really don’t know. I wish I had an answer, some pithy little panacea that would suddenly make it all right. I don’t. All I know is that I try my best, and sometimes fail, as the beginning of this post pointed out, to follow the common sense teachings of old. Always judge others based on who they are, not what they are. Respect everyone as an equal, no better, no worse than yourself. Seek power from within yourself. It’s a poor chef that blames his oven. ( Sorry, had to, this is supposed to be somewhat of a food blog )

So why am I writing this? Who knows. My original idea blew up in my face for one. I also think in some way it’s because I turn 50 in 35 days and I’m beginning to look at things with an end-game in sight. With one son going into the Air Force and the other still finding out who he is, the uncertainty in this world weighs on me. I’m getting tired of all the hate. I watch political ads from all sides with my insides in knots and wonder where the hell we went wrong. I question how people can say “I love all God’s creatures!” and then follow that up with, “Except for those damn…” I ponder the insanity of believing a God created all we see, all we are, and yet believe that there is only one way to know this God, and all other ways are wrong and should be stopped. I’m also wonder why those who don’t believe in a God say those that do are somehow inferior or wrong.

Mostly, I think, I’m just plain tired of people feeling a need to force opinions, beliefs, understandings on others. And then when others don’t agree with them, they start the hate. Surely we’ve come far enough to have debate without hate. Or, maybe we really do need hate to survive. I sure as hell hope not.


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